Some things kids say in my classes

This happens in about half of all classes:
Student: (in Japanese) How old are you?
Me: How old am I? I'm 24.
Random other student: Jack Bauer...

Every elementary school class:
Me: How are you?
Child: I'm happy!
Me: How are you?
Child: I'm Snoopy!
Me: I'm SLEEPY
Child: I'm SLEEPY.
Me: How are you?
Child: I'm English!

Every junior high first year class (7th grade):
Me: Any volunteers to do a presentation?
Students: (Blank stare)
Me: Anyone?
One Student: (meekly raises hand, gives presentation)
Me: Thank you! Here's a sticker.
All other students: Eeehhh!!!?!?!! (Raise hands)

Students in the hallway have learned a new word:
Student: Hello!
Me: Hi! How are you?
Student: I'm sleepy. And you?
Me: Me too.
Student: Shut up!
Other student: Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

At least they use what they learn in class:
Student: Sam-sensei! Hello! How are you?
Me: I'm hot. How are you?
Student: Me too. (pause) May I see your passport?
Me: What?
Student: Do you have any plants or vegetables?